Top 10 Statements Guaranteed To Make Democrats Mad
Posted by supercynic on September 2, 2008
I’ve moved. Please come join me at my new site The Daily Wit. This post and lots of other great new stuff are there.
Before you Democrats get mad, please note that I also wrote a post like this about Republicans. So, here we go — the Top 10 statements that I guarantee will make liberals angry.
Honorable Mention: “Hillary is a bitch and Obama is an empty suit.”
10. “Roe v. Wade? Yeah, that’s a goner.”
9. “Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior? You do know that if you haven’t, you’re going to hell, right?”
8. “Junior, you and your sister stop playing with my loaded pistol that has no safety on it. Now, your mom and I are going upstairs to take a nap, so you put that gun back in an easily accessible location and let us get some sleep.”
7. “I can help you fix that flat tire — and I can do it without government playing any role whatsoever.”
6. “Women who don’t wear make up are ugly and they tend to be uppity. Why can’t they just cook my supper and hush up?”
5. “Ok, son, take all these cans and other recyclables and just throw them in the trash. Mother Nature can handle it.”
4. “And if elected, I promise a pound of red meat in every pot and an SUV in every driveway.”
3. “So, I said, ‘If you haven’t done anything wrong, you don’t need to worry about the government spying on us. The government would never abuse that power.’”
2. “We’ll make up the budgetary shortfall caused by cutting taxes on the rich white men by eliminating NPR.”
1. “Later, we’ll be hearing from President Karl Rove.”
Feel free to add a few.
This entry was posted on September 2, 2008 at 10:33 am and is filed under Humor, Politics, Religion. Tagged: abortion, Barack Obama, Christianity, Christians, climate change, Democrats, environment, global warming, guns, Hillary Clinton, Humor, Jesus Christ, karl rove, NPR, NRA, Politics, Religion, Republicans, Roe v. Wade, satire, vegans, vegetarians. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
Mujtaba said
I didn’t get the the 9th point
“Roe v. Wade? Yeah, that’s a goner.”
Whats that mean?
Tag: Funny pictures
supercynic said
Roe v. Wade is the United States Supreme Court decision that gives women the right to have an abortion. Overturning that decision would effectively allow states to pass laws disallowing abortions.
travellinbaen said
1. Don’t worry, some will trickle down to you. Eventually. Probably.
2. I think this is working out real well for these people.
kelly said
wow. that last one was a doosie.
hicker said
Consideration:
Did you hear Palin’s speech? She is GOOOOOOD.
BTW – Did you hear McCain was a war hero?
Big D said
If you can’t afford health care, you don’t deserve to live.
the bible says …
George Bush didn’t get into Harvard via affirmative action.
supercynic said
McCain’s a war hero?? I guess I missed that article. Palin is good in a scary way. Her ability to rise to the occasion masks a whole lot of things I’d rather not have in a vice-president. Funny, she won’t give any interviews though.
Big D, thanks for the funny additions and for dropping by. “The Bible says” is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot down here.
hicker said
Supercynic, McCain is up 4. WTF, Dude?
“Thanks, but no thanks”
“Country first, except when it comes to picking my back-up”
supercynic said
Hicker — I can’t explain the polls, or, rather, I can explain them, but putting it in writing would just make me more jaded and cynical. Want to stage a public Obama rally next weekend and see how fast we can end up in a fight with a non-voting, but opinionated nonetheless, dude?
Ilovemyguns said
Palin just gave ABC news an interview last night, and she beat down every loaded question that was shot at her. It’s absolutely scary how likable she is. Liberals, be afraid. Be very, very afraid.
supercynic said
Respectfully, we have different takes on how Palin did. I find it scary that people find her likable. I would change your last sentence to “Americans, be afraid. Be very, very afraid.” And I’m not even a “liberal.”
hicker said
huh? “other than last year’s trip to Kuwait, have you been outside the country?” “yes, canada and mexico”…..long pause. and, alaska, if i would have been successful in getting us suceeded from the union.
liberal, conservative, white man, loser, whatever i am…..don’t worry, i am afraid, i am very afraid.
janey said
I guess Im chuckling inside because a tough talking, sharp, married with child woman 6 months ago was called a bitch and now its likable. Now Ilovemyguns wants me to be afraid, very, very afraid…..Hmp. Lets say “be a hypocrite. be a big, big hypocrite.” Anyhoo, Im used to it. Been studying it for three years. Great future research and publications for me. Glory be to God because I need a job (and insurance, right Yackster?).
supercynic said
How come the liberal media aren’t pouncing on Palin’s pandering to the secessionist movement in Alaska? If Obama had any association with a group that could even be perceived to be radical, they’d be all over it. Oh, wait. They have — the Rev.Wright flak.
I’ve been waiting for the liberal media to show up and start shining some lights on McCain’s ad campaign and Palin’s actions in Alaska, but thus far, they’re like Bigfoot: people say they exist, but no on can prove it.
Now even Obama has misleading ads out, and the separation of truth from politics widens.